Sunday, July 06, 2008

Step by Step

If you look at my blog over the past two years you will find a pattern. Monday morning I am strong willed and head strong, ready to kick myself into shape. Wednesdays I find myself winding down. By Friday I am having trouble with my food and my exercise routines is lacking. The weekends are filled with lazy days and bad food choices... and Monday morning I am guilt ridden and ready to start all over again. Determined that this week will be the perfect week.

This pattern can drive a person crazy... but at the same time, it is this pattern that has kept me somewhat on track.

In my head I feel like I could whip myself into shape in a month. Eat nothing but healthy food, workout 3 hours a day, lose 50 lbs and be the perfect size 9.

In my head that is what I am doing. In real life, I am battling with my food disorder, I am a mother of two very active toddlers who don't give me time to do all the workouts I want to, and I am the perfect size 14. It is sometimes heart breaking when I think back at how long it has taken me to come this far. I am standing at the bottom of a staircase, and it has taken me a year to take the first step up.

So, the second step is looming in the future somewhere. Between here and there is a maze of food choices, workouts, water hazards and life.

Tomorrow is Monday... another fresh start. Depending on my choices, this week could bring me another inch, or another foot, closer to that second step. I would prefer the later of the two.. but then, that would be up to me now... wouldn't it.


dancer-in-me said...

I wish that even monday would give me that fresh start lately. Seems I am all out of fresh starts for the moment. I am trying to get back on track tomorrow.

I am so proud and amazed at all you have accomplished. You look amazing in your pictures. You can see muscles and are getting very toned and defined. You are a very fit size 14. Not a lot of people can say that. I always enjoy your posts.

Wanna_B_slimmer said...

I soooo know what you are talking about... my week is exactly the same.. I blow out big time on weekends....
my weekend starts Thursday night after my weigh in!!!

Fatinah said...

Um, Tigerlilly, can you please take a look at the photos you have posted on your blog. You are not still on the first step my love.

Don't get me wrong, I completely understand what you mean, since I could have written this post myself, but please, don't let your heart break too much, because you have come a long, long way even in the time that I have been reading.

You rock!

Mark Salinas said...

"Concentrate all your thoughts upon the work at hand. The sun's rays do not burn until brought to a focus."

BTW...Dara Torres broke some American records...I posted a quick blurb at my site!

Robyn said...

I feel the same way! I does keep us going, though, however dysfunctional it really kind of is. :) I just try to hope for at least ONE perfect week per month. At least then, I feel like I've done SOMETHING. Whenever you have your perfect entire week....tell us ALL about it! And I'll do the same.
Until then...