Thursday, May 29, 2008

War and Peace

WARNING: VENTING AHEAD

I had a breakdown last night. I have been trying to be a part of Hubbys family since day 1... and for 5 years I have been shot down, rejected, given the cold shoulder. It absolutely amazes me that a family with 2 daughter, 6 sons, 5 daughter in laws and 8 grand kids... they DON'T KNOW HOW TO BE A FAMILY. I am the youngest of four kids. My brother and sisters were pretty much grown and out of the house when I came along, so you could say I was an only child. I know what a family should be like. You love them no matter what. My MIL has not seen our girls since Christmas, yet she drives by our house (literally....our house is 3 blocks off the main highway) to go visit Hubbys younger brother and his kids every other weekend. She has been to ONE of their birthdays..(I think it was Angels first b-day 4 years ago)... Yesterday Hubbys two sisters, one sister in law and her kids, my MIL and my father in laws NEW FRICKIN WIFE all got together yesterday to make some of the food for the dinner and dance tomorrow night. Did they call me? Nope.... and they call is a family event! Pffft

I AM DONE!!!!!

I am not going to try to be a part of this family any more. 5 years is enough. No more being nice to people who do nothing but hurt my family. If they want to see a cold shoulder, then I will give it to them. I love my family and my Hubby. Thankfully my family knows how to love and include my Hubby in everything.... AAAAAAAAAAARrrrrrrrrrrgggggggghhhhhhhhh..... I am so frustrated.

Why? You ask. There are a couple of reasons. First, hubby has always been the black sheep of the family. He was always in trouble and was a severe alcoholic in his 20's. He has been sober for 4 years now and has not even been pulled over for speeding. He has turned his life around and I am proud of him. As for me... my MIL loved Hubby's first wife... I don't make the cut. The rest of the family are just hateful conniving b*&^%$.

I am trying not to be like them.... but I really cant turn another cheek.

Ok, venting is over....

Yesterdays workout was a good one. I did my Plyometrics and it was a kick butt hour of jumping. Then I did my shoulder and arms weights... I was really worn out when I started, so it made for a hellacious hour. When I was done I felt good. I was drenched is sweat and proud that I got through both workouts.

Today's Plan:

Yoga

Focus:
water and food

8 comments:

Fatinah said...

I have quite a similar situation with my inlaws - I've been living the dream for almost 19 years. It doesn't get any easier. Everytime husband says don't let it bother you - let it go. Everytime I cry and say why do they have to be that way??? I feel for you hon!!

Teresa said...

Family are the worst to deal with. (Obviously because the are supposed to be your support system). Also have issues with mine going on 28 years. (Similar to yours, that is kids being snubbed and not included in family things) Be strong, their loss.

P.O.M. said...

It seems like a lot of people go through that. Stay strong.

You're soooo close to being in the 180s I can feel it!

lisah said...

Hey TL,

As the saying goes..."you can't pick your family"! I am glad you have a safe place to vent and a supportive husband. As to hubby's past, it sounds like he has turned things around with your help therefore I would think that the family would be thanking you! Keep your chin up.

lisa

Carol Bardelli said...

I'm so sorry about you family troubles. You shouldn't have to associate with them if they can't be civil and even handed with how they treat family.

You're look great! Keep up the hard work.

Jill said...

How could they NOT love you!!! You're adorable!!!!

Like you said,they don't know how to be a family. My hub's family is the same way - we have to get together for every holiday, but they can't stand each other, so it's never fun!!

So sorry you have to deal with that shizz, but just know that you are the better person - and you won't do that to your kids' families.

the [s u g a r c r a c k] diaries said...

I don't understand what it is with some families!! Geesh!

Let me know if there's anything I can do!

xoxoxo
Michelle

P.S. Can you give a review on P90X or share a link if you've already reviewed it? I'm thinking about getting it for my birthday tomorrow!

Robyn said...

My husband and I have been married for 6 years now, but we've been together for more than 8. Only very recently have I began to be able to stand his parents. They are just so different from my family, and I feel sorry for my husband that he does not have more loving parents - - who call occasionally or come visit or send birthday cards, or act interested in their grandchilren - - you know, standard parent-stuff. Not them. They are divorced, and each remarried, and it seems that each of them see my husband as the product of their failed marriage, and so they treat him more like an aquaintance than a son. It drives me crazy. My husband deserves better than that!
So, I just had to tell you that I think I know how you feel. Only, thank goodness that his parents live 900 miles away from us, so we don't have to deal with them very often! Hahaa!!
It's getting much better, though. His mom and step dad came to visit for Memorial Day, and I made it through without getting upset about anything at all! That was probably the first time ever, though.