Friday, May 30, 2008

World War 3

I was upset yesterday... it carried on into the afternoon when I met up with 'the family' for a meeting on the benefit dinner and dance that we are putting on today. Usually I would turn the other cheek, keep my mouth shut and ignore things... but for some reason I could not do it anymore. My mouth opened and a waterfall of emotions came out with it. I told them how I felt and that I was fed up with the family acting this way.

It was the beginning of World War 3. This morning I woke up to hateful messages on my phone from my SIL ...."You don't know what you've done, you've messed with the wrong person."... yeah, not the phrase you want to wake up to . So for the first 3 hours of my morning I have been on the phone. First with mad SIL... that just made it worse, so when she hung up on me I just let it go. Then with Hubby who gave me the 'ol stick with your guns talk. Then with my mom who backed me up 100%. Then , finally, with my FIL's new wife. I had questioned where she stood on this family feud... and she made me feel much better. Apparently 'the family' has been doing the same thing to her. Of course they would, she is the new meat!! She and I compared stories.. and many of the things that 'the family' had told me were lies... the sad thing was the NMIL (new mother in law) had been told by my FIL before they were marred that I was the one that 'the family' left out of the loop all the time. Imagine that... its been common knowledge for years, yet no one has ever said or done anything about it. I guess it was my place to finally stand up for myself... and I did.

Today is going to be hell. We have the benefit dinner and dance to put on.. we will all be at the rodeo grounds at noon today. As much as I would love to stay home and away from those women, I am proud of what we have put together and am proud of those boys for making the National College Rodeo Finals in Wyoming. I am going to pray that they just give me the cold shoulder all day so that words don't have to be exchanged.

I will say that I woke up this morning wishing I had not said anything. I could have just quietly and slowly pushed myself away from them... but at the same time I wanted them all to know how terrible they have been.

NMIL has been wonderful. She has already spoken her mind to mad SIL and backed me up 100%... I think that in the end I will have made a true friend in all this mess.

Today's Plan:

Stay calm, stick to your guns and stay true to yourself, your girls and your husband.


On getting those boys to Wyoming!


Christy said...

Oh goodness! I'm sorry you are going through this. That's absolutely horrible that your inlaws have put you through this. But honestly - if they are these kinds of people, you don't need them to be your friends. It's unfortunate that it's family and you can't just walk away and ignore them forever, but focus on what you said

"Stay calm, stick to your guns and stay true to yourself, your girls and your husband".

Don't waste too much energy on them, save that for your family who loves you. You've done the best you can, if they arelike that, there is no changing it - leave them be. I'm proud of you for saying what you said, sur ei would have been easier to keep your mouth shut, but I always tell people if they are going to complain, make sure they try to do something about it, cause if you don't voice your opinion, how are people going to know what you think? Well now they know, and they've obviously stayed true to themselves being ignorant (enter expletive word here), so you dont' want them close to you anyways.

Just my two cents.

Jill said...


I, for one, am so proud of you for letting it all out, now they know they can't push you around anymore. Listen to your hubby - he sounds like a great guy!

At least you know you have your NMIL on your side, and if you two can become friends out of this, even better! It's "the family's" loss, not yours, if they can't see what a great gal you are - hell, I don't even know you in real life and I can see what an awesome chick you are!!

Good luck with the rodeo, and just keep your chin up girl! You'll get through it! =)

Carol Bardelli said...

Way to go, Tigerlilly! I'm proud of you for standing up for yourself. They're lucky they just got a tongue lashing and not some Kenpo karate moves. Hope the benefit goes well...

P.O.M. said...

Hang in there! Speaking your mind is never easy, but it looks like something good did come out of it! I usually regret my big mouth initially, but after time passes, then I'm glad when I speak up. I tend to always speak up (Flashing back to the Christmas 06 that I totally ruined with my big mouth). But a couple months later, I got an APOLOGY letter!

Good luck with the benefit! And try to have fun.

Jessica said...

Well hon, I'm glad you said something to them. You've put up with their exclusions for long enough!
And SIL with that message, come on. Maybe THEY don't know who THEY'VE been messing with????
And really, what could she do? Be meaner? Who cares.
That's when you whip out the tang soo do. Blam!

I'm so glad that Hubby is backing you up. Don't take that for granted, a lot of guys side with their moms no matter what. He's a keeper for sure!
I hope everything goes smoothly tonight. If nothing else, you could always spur someone if it came down to it.

Like I said yesterday...I'm so glad I don't have a mother in law! :)
I'm here to be vented on, if you need someone to talk to.
Also, warm weather = park days!

Anonymous said...

Hey Christy, my computer crashed and when it got restored I had lost all my addresses....send me your e-mail address please...and let me tell you how proud I am of you and all that Sibley blood that finally reached boiling point! Mine never stays calm very long in a situation like that..I Love You, Aunt J

Anonymous said...

I am SO PROUD OF YOU! You absolutely deserve only the best and they need to know that you are no longer going to be their doormat. You are simply amazing for having taken it for so long and it was only a matter of time before the true Tigerlilly leaped out at them!